LIFESTYLE- While some separations move right towards divorce, there are a few that may see a fresh start and a revival of marriage. After being separated, some couples may realize that they still have some fond feelings for each other and are often in a dilemma about whether to reconcile or not.
If you are wondering you can get back together with your spouse and make it work. Here are the tips to get back together after separation with your spouse.
1. Be honest with yourself
You want to get back together and you are sure it will work. In case you have doubts or are confused, it is better to take a step back and get some clarity first. If possible, talk to someone who knows you and your spouse better, but do not hide anything from your partner.
2. Clear communication
It is essential to have transparent communication with your spouse so that both of you know what you are looking for and expecting from each other after getting back together. It also helps in developing a close bond between you and your partner. This could also help you not to repeat the mistakes that you made before separation.
3. Slow down to make things work out
Going in and out of the marriage without giving much thought and acting hastily is not a good idea. You might have decided on separation in haste, and it might have been a mistake. But don’t repeat the same mistake when you are thinking of getting back.
Even when trying to get back together after separation, see that you are not rushing on things. For instance, don’t keep going on dates or don’t keep calling or texting all day. Go slow, give space to each other, and let things move at their own pace.
4. Be acceptable of the new
You should accept the fact that everything is not going to be the same as it was before. You should be prepared to face the new changes in your marriage. For example, you may get to see a change in your partner’s behavior or habits. That’s normal. Life teaches many lessons when you are alone and away from your spouse. So be ready to accept some new things, including that you may not want if you want the marriage to work this time around.
5. Give priority to your marriage
When you are giving your marriage a second chance, make it a priority. It means prioritizing your spouse and marriage over friends, work, egos, and other things in life. This feeling should come from both the committed parties so that your new relationship is built on a healthy foundation.
6. Be expressive
When you get back together after separation, you should not hide or suppress feelings and emotions. Be honest and let them know how you feel – do not act on the emotions, as that could be detrimental to this new union when both of you could be vulnerable. At the same time, hiding your feelings will not help the relationship.
7. Don’t dig the past
You have made up your mind to move on and get along with your spouse after separation. Then there is no point in looking back. One of the common mistakes that couples do when trying to get back is to talk about the past. Before they realize, they end up blaming each other and create another mess in their relationship.
So, it is better to move forward positively and talk about your future and make mutual plans to avoid the mistakes from before.
8. Learn from the past
Most separated couples find it challenging to get back together because they carry baggage on their shoulders. There could be anger, guilt, stress, and frustration.
Both of you might have made mistakes that led you towards separation. You must have realized those mistakes when you were away from your spouse. Keep them in mind and see that they are not repeated.
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